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Anthony Fauci—America’s most decorated bureaucrat and least accidental celebrity—follows “the science” of self-reflection in this newly leaked, never-before-seen diary, proudly misrepresented by comedian Rob Schneider.

In The (Not Real) Anthony Fauci Diary, the curtain rises on masked balls, carefully choreographed COVID leaks, and celebrity Zoom calls calibrated to keep the nation calm. When difficult questions arise, he does what any humble public servant would: adopts a look of rehearsed concern and confides in his most faithful acolyte—his diary.

Comedian Rob Schneider aims his comedic barbs at the literary bombshell that could have been—the Fauci diaries . . . as found by Rob Schneider. Part confession, part cover-up, and part campaign memoir for the man who is auditioning for sainthood, this would-be diary will leave you breathless, from laughter, not COVID.