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From her own childhood days when "r," "l," and "s" sounds eluded her to 28 years in education teaching students how to speak clearly and effectively, speech pathologist Amanda Lynch gained insight far beyond talking – she learned that words are only the beginning of communication.

Overturned desks. Hurled objects. Screams. Yelling. Stone cold silence. Crossed arms. Defiant stares. Lynch began to hear the words behind the behavior:

I’m scared.

I’m lonely.

I’m defeated.

I’m done.

And she learned how to communicate right back.

If you want to see beyond the behavior – if you truly care and need to know how to talk with the challenging student in front of you – here’s what worked in Lynch’s speech room, and how.