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Raised in the shadow of the Pacific Northwest's most notorious predators, Jill grew up knowing how easily girls could disappear. Ted Bundy, the Green River Killer-these names were part of the landscape, as were the near-misses: first a close call for Jill's sister, and years later, one for Jill herself.A chilling phone call from a stranger becomes the fracture point in Jill's marriage-and the spark that leads her to a martial arts dojo. Training becomes a lifeline. So when a second predator targets her, it's her instructor who steps between her and danger. Their bond deepens, they open a dojo together, and they fall in love. But as Liam's mental health unravels, the man who once protected her becomes the one she must learn to survive.Told through six sections-Run, Block, Fake, Parry, Strike, Accept-Learning to Spar mirrors the techniques Jill must master both on the mat and in life. With unflinching honesty, she navigates escalating threats, profound grief, and the deaths of three family members, including her father. Alongside the systemic forces of patriarchy she has battled her entire life, Jill also confronts the intimate, complicated relationship with her father as she reckons with a painful incident from childhood.Both heart-pounding and deeply introspective, Learning to Spar exposes how our culture romanticizes predators and abandons the women they hunt. In the end, Jill's story-of earning her black belt, reclaiming her agency, and refusing to be prey-becomes a testament to resilience, autonomy, and the power of fighting back.
Raised in the shadow of the Pacific Northwest's most notorious predators, Jill grew up knowing how easily girls could disappear. Ted Bundy, the Green River Killer-these names were part of the landscape, as were the near-misses: first a close call for Jill's sister, and years later, one for Jill herself.A chilling phone call from a stranger becomes the fracture point in Jill's marriage-and the spark that leads her to a martial arts dojo. Training becomes a lifeline. So when a second predator targets her, it's her instructor who steps between her and danger. Their bond deepens, they open a dojo together, and they fall in love. But as Liam's mental health unravels, the man who once protected her becomes the one she must learn to survive.Told through six sections-Run, Block, Fake, Parry, Strike, Accept-Learning to Spar mirrors the techniques Jill must master both on the mat and in life. With unflinching honesty, she navigates escalating threats, profound grief, and the deaths of three family members, including her father. Alongside the systemic forces of patriarchy she has battled her entire life, Jill also confronts the intimate, complicated relationship with her father as she reckons with a painful incident from childhood.Both heart-pounding and deeply introspective, Learning to Spar exposes how our culture romanticizes predators and abandons the women they hunt. In the end, Jill's story-of earning her black belt, reclaiming her agency, and refusing to be prey-becomes a testament to resilience, autonomy, and the power of fighting back.
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